Matthew Whitaker's speech at Harvard College Class Day 2012

Humorous student speech at Harvard College Class Day 2012

Matthew Whitaker

 

In his Ivy Oration, one of two humorous student speeches given on Class Day, Matthew Whitaker ’12 joked that John Harvard would be proud a yard named for him has become an international tourist destination, and pondered  how he would feel if he were to come back to life and realize he had become an international brand name. Using the “The man. The myth. The legend” as an example, Whitaker urged his peers to look up to those who not only achieve, but contribute: “I hope that we will continue to not only remember those who achieved, but those who contributed. So, fellow classmates, when you take your last steps around this great yard, please take a moment to stop at the John Harvard statue. And before you unzip your pants to pee on that statue one last time, say, “Thank you, John Harvard. Thank you.”

Related topics

You might also like

Harvard Football: Harvard 34, Cornell 10

The Crimson stays unbeaten following a hard fight with the Big Red

Harvard Football: Harvard 59, Holy Cross 24

Another week, another blowout, this one against an in-state rival

Most popular

What Trump Means for John Roberts's Legacy

Executive power is on the docket at the Supreme Court.

Harvard’s Endowment, Donations Rise—but the University Runs a Deficit

The annual financial report signals severe challenges to come.

Harvard’s New Playbook for Teaching with AI

Faculty across Harvard are rethinking assignments to integrate AI. 

Explore More From Current Issue

Aerial view of a landscaped area with trees and seating, surrounded by buildings and parking.

Landscape Architect Julie Bargmann Transforming Forgotten Urban Sites

Julie Bargmann and her D.I.R.T. Studio give new life to abandoned mines, car plants, and more.

Three book covers arranged in a row on a beige background with a red border.

Must-Read Harvard Books Winter 2025

From aphorisms to art heists to democracy’s necessary conditions 

Wolfram Schlenker wearing a suit sitting outdoors, smiling, with trees and a building in the background.

Harvard Economist Wolfram Schlenker Is Tackling Climate Change

How extreme heat affects our land—and our food supply