Matthew Whitaker: “There’s Something About John Harvard”

Humorous student speech at Harvard College Class Day 2012

Matthew Whitaker

 

In his Ivy Oration, one of two humorous student speeches given on Class Day, Matthew Whitaker ’12 joked that John Harvard would be proud a yard named for him has become an international tourist destination, and pondered  how he would feel if he were to come back to life and realize he had become an international brand name. Using the “The man. The myth. The legend” as an example, Whitaker urged his peers to look up to those who not only achieve, but contribute: “I hope that we will continue to not only remember those who achieved, but those who contributed. So, fellow classmates, when you take your last steps around this great yard, please take a moment to stop at the John Harvard statue. And before you unzip your pants to pee on that statue one last time, say, “Thank you, John Harvard. Thank you.”

Sub topics

You might also like

Harvard Plans Contingencies for International Students

The Kennedy School and School of Public Health are developing online options.

Stand-Up to Simmer Down

In comedy groups, students find ways to be absurd, present, and a little less self-conscious.

Most popular

Harvard Layoffs Continue, with More to Come

In the wake of federal government actions, several Harvard schools and institutes are cutting costs.

Agree to Disagree

The Undergraduate asks if intellectualism is really on life support.

The New Gender Gaps

What to do as men and boys fall behind

Explore More From Current Issue

Will the U.S. Dollar Always Be So Powerful?

The preeminence of U.S. currency at risk

New Harvard Overseers and HAA Directors

Alumni showed increased interest in this year’s elections.

Harvard Summer Reading Picks | 2025

The wealth gap, shamanism, the life of David Nathan, and more